My solution/workaround/forfeit was to not run Proxmox.
This is a proxmox forum and we are talking about a proxmox issue here.
As mentioned - if you have the skills and are willing to help ( = putting something with real value on the table) I am more then willing to create a debian based kernel (+ patches of proxmox) and / or a more recent ubuntu kernel (with the proxmox patches). e.g. we should use the same zfs modules as the official proxmox kernel.
The chances that usb is working is much higher then with the current proxmox kernel.
If not - I found my workaround. I also don't "donate" this hard work to anybody in the community (I do a lot of other opensource stuff in my valuable free time).
If you know anybody who has the same issues - who is willing to work on a custom kernel - just ping me.