VMFS does not conflict with Proxmox, whatever filesystem you use on Proxmox. Relevant is is the guests filesytem. And the guest filesystem is indepent from the filesystem you choose for Proxmox itself. Important is that you use a filesystem for Proxmox supporting snapshots. like LVM pr ZFS. While ZFS is is the better filesystem as it is easy to handle, extrem stable and failure tolerant, expandable and so on.
BTW I do not understand at all what you will say with your posts
ZFS can be pretty good as a filesystem. Not as awesome as VMFS shared over a SAN, but it definitely has some good points, but their strengths are very different and not really comparable.
I think his point was that ZFS can run into some serious performance issues under certain conditions. He didn't go into detail, but the most common are if the server doesn't have enough ram, or if you try to have it deduplication, especially on HDD. It sounds like you verified you have enough memory, so as long as you are not trying to have ZFS do dedupe not sure what other issues he might be referring to.
Have you checked dmesg on the PVE and PBS systems for any issues?